Wednesday, May 14, 2008

The Notebook

Sorry to disappoint, but this is not a tribute to the Nicholas Sparks novel, or a tribute to the dreamy Ryan Gosling. This is a post about the notebook that one of my friends keeps on her desk at work.

The notebook is a list of words that shouldn't be used. Ever. There are all kinds of words in the notebook. Some are corporate buzzwords, while others are just words that give you a sick to your stomach feeling when you hear them. Here is a random sample of words that are currently listed in the notebook:

Crisp
Chutney
Secrete
Morsel
Curdle

The notebook has been a part of our office culture for years. I say 'years' because it was there when I started, and I'm too lazy to find out when the notebook was actually created. I think 'years' also adds to the legend of the notebook.

The notebook is democratic. Anyone can offer a word to add, and submissions are rarely vetoed. Words don't even have to be used in the office to be added. The creator of the notebook went to the pet store with her daughter over the weekend, and that's how 'newt' was added to the list.

I think everyone has a notebook in their head. Just a list of words that you don't use for whatever reason. When you hear these words, you stop listening to the notebook violator. If you'd like to share some of the words in your notebook, post them as comments. There's a good chance that they are already in the notebook. Oh, and keep it clean...this is a family blog. Seriously...my parents read this stuff.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Noodle
Noodling

Should be banned, especially when said by someone who pontificates A LOT but never delivers.

Hmmm... maybe add Pontificate to the notebook too.

All are used way too freqently in Redmond.

Al Iverson said...

anything ending in 'ectomy.' excitement. plunge. energize. lozenge. and, reputation.

Nate Romance said...

To our loyal Redmond reader, can you support me in adding 'ecosystem' to the notebook? I think I've heard that once or twice out there.

Al, along with reputation, I'd like to add 'seasoning' to the list. I die a little bit inside everytime I hear someone use that term at work.

Al Iverson said...

Seasoning! It makes me think of salting slugs.

Amanda said...

figlet. (these can be bought in most grocery stores. The word irritates me).

nugs. While not technically a word, my boyfriend calls chicken nuggets "nugs". The word grosses me out.

I have more, but I can't think of any at the moment. I'm sure I'll be back.

Nate Romance said...

Bobanda,

I'm pretty sure that 'nugs' was used as slang for breasts by Pauly Shore back in the Encino Man and Son in Law days. Yeah, that word is terrible for many reasons.

Amanda said...

Nate,

That only makes it worse. Far, far worse.

Al Iverson said...

I find that word offensive to my delicate PC sensibilities!

Anonymous said...

Yes on ecosystem.

While we're on a Redmond roll, can we add the following phrases? Is there a phrase section to the notebook?

Re-org
Net net
Let's take this offline
A plan for the plan
A meeting to schedule the meeting

This could go on forever really...

Caitlin said...

moist



it just makes me ill.

Nate Romance said...

I'm pretty sure moist is on the first page, Caitlin... now get back to work.

Anonymous said...

i hate the word "panties"...makes me feel very uncomfortable. i don't think it should ever be used...let's just call them underpants.

Kim said...

I also hate the word 'panties.' Especially when someone says, 'pannies.' But, it is fun to use the word to gross people out. For example, my sister's boyfriend is a fireman in Arlington. He let us go down the fire pole and I asked, 'do we have to wear panties?"

Another notebook word: penetrate.